Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize