and you said cock pushups were impossible
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Randomize
