I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
