We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We were destined to go to rehab together
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Randomize