This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize