Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize