i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
