I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
There's a naked man in my car right now.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
