She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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