Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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