you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
