Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The uberlube is also flammable
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
