so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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