I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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