i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
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