there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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