careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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