Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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