D3 body, D1 cock
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
