Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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