8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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