dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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