My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
