People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
