She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
