My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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