Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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