Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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