You're completely useless in the revolution.
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize