You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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