There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
