new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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