no you cant smoke seaweed
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
