From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
