just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
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Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
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Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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