The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
