I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize