clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I am naked and annoyed.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
