he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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