You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
