Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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