You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
