I wanna bring you to show and tell
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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