Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
try to milk me bitch
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