Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
