9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize