I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize