I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
