I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
