Don't you send me to vm
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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