The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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