ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
