We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize